As promised

So, as promised, here's my annual rant about administrative professional's day. I'm going to start with my search for a good obnoxious administrative professional's day card on some ecards, which is my favorite site for obnoxious and funny electronic cards. It's a great site, but even they have let me down this year, with their stupid self-depreciating cards such as "we'd have gotten you a card that was signed by everyone, but you're the one who organizes those things." What the fuck is that? Since when did some ecards start kissing up to anyone?

Here's my problem with administrative professional's day. First, they get paid to do their jobs, just like I get paid to do my job. Some of them get paid less than what they deserve, just like I get paid less than I deserve (and some of them get paid more than they deserve, and some of them get paid well more than me). I often ask them to do their job in order to help me with my job, much like my boss asks me to do my job in order to help him with his job. Do you see a trend here? Why the fuck do they get a special day when we are all supposed to kiss their asses and shower them with gifts when all they've done is do their jobs?

I mean, don't get me wrong. I really like my secretary. She does a great job. I'm glad she's my secretary. But it's not like she does my dry cleaning, or holds my hair back while I puke or something. She comes to work, does her job, and goes home. So do the rest of us. I mean hell, I've put in about a zillion hours of overtime this month alone. I don't get a special day when everybody tells me I'm the fucking cat's meow. I just get to come in tomorrow and do it again.

My other problem with this is that it's not just my secretary. Its every administrative professional we have. And we have a lot. So, I either don't give at all, or I give only to a select few, and the rest start talking about me behind my back and telling people how much of a bitch I am, or I go broke. Those are my options.

And I have to say that for the most part,our staff are all really helpful, and I appreciate them all. But the answer to that is when they help you out, say, "hey, I really appreciate that. Thanks." If other people are so woefully neglectful (or conceited or arrogant, or stupid) that they don't do that, it's not my fault, and it shouldn't cost me. I shouldn't have to pay a lack-of-human-decency tax because my co-worker is a prick.

In the end, I am thankfully not going to be in the office tomorrow, so I don't have to sit around there feeling uncomfortable because I didn't hire a marching band to proclaim the awesome ability of my administrative staff to do their job. Probably because of that, this year's rant is a little tame. I hope I haven't disappointed you.